Today’s Mom Tears™ are brought to you by “Mother’s Day pandemic” and “Well, here we are”

I haven’t done much writing lately…. Believe it or not here is not my only forum for collecting words. I normally write far more than I speak. For those of you I do not know personally. It’s a shit-ton. I talk in my sleep, I talk to myself, heck I still even talk on the phone! Words continuously collect and stiffen in my mind and more times than not get jotted down on random pieces of paper, gather in half thoughts on the notes app on my phone. I visit them often re arranging adding to or taking away sounds and syllables.
But lately, lately…. The written word has muddled almost to heavy to put down fearing they may be seen. It is strange to come across my scattered pen and pencil collections and fear daunted when reaching for them. Sadness too because there is a huge hole where all the words used to be.

However, I suppose we should begin….

Two events are quickly approaching the first and most important is Mother’s Day. Listen its not a day I have ever thought was mine cause lets be real. Giving birth does NOT make one a mom. It only makes you someone’s mother. A mom is ANY woman in your life by birth or meeting that has the ability to stop, comfort, love, scold, encourage, wipe tears away without it ever appearing to be effort simply because she would stop her world to make yours move. I am incredibly blessed to be surrounded by women who exemplify this. I seriously am awestruck by the “moms” I know. I’m talking about the ones who work a few jobs, manage to be places with kiddos when sleep or quiet would be preferred. The moms who call other moms just to check in when really, they are so busy getting it done that it’s the last thing they need to do. The women who “mom it” for neighbours, who put their needs last on the list, the women who hurt when they see someone struggle who help without expecting credit. It is your day too. There is nothing more beautiful than the love of a mom. If you have one or multiple of these exceptional women in your life let her know just how important she is. You may be quite surprised. I’m pretty sure you are “her” to someone ❤

AND

here we are…. We meaning me. See above for reference to conversations with myself. It has dawned on me that I am on the brink of turning 47. What the actual @#$? !! Seriously? I was just learning to embrace 46. I mean its not young ….. but apparently forty-seven is supposed to be the most depressing year of your life!!! WHAT?!?! “They” say that it is at this point you have reached all the mile stones in life:
Education
Marriage
Bought a house
Kids
Here’s where I’m lucky I guess
Divorced
repurchased same house for more money of course. The previous owners really gave it the lived-in motif.

SOOOOOOO

I guess it’s a mere slide into the next phase….

Better butter the gang up so they put me in an average old age home. Hope for the best expect the worst.

I’m going to call a spade a spade here 46 was no walk in the park. I have been pushed to the breaking point. Actually, I have dipped my toes in the waters of the other side…. Ok. Ok. I have stood in the water on the other side. Its right about then when I think to myself. Holy crap Leigh you are a skip to 50!  FIFTY!!!! I always thought I’d have my shit together by then and be confident without caring that I had confidence. Is the next year a realization that I AM an adult??? I mean come on I still feel late twenty something. Wouldn’t do the teen years again not for a million dollars. So, late twenties it is.
Someone recently asked my age and when I said almost 47, we both looked horrified. I couldn’t pick up their chin because I was poking my eyes back in their sockets and reaching for my chin …. After nursing seven kids I could hardly decipher between a fallen chin or chest. I digress that’s another story for another day.

So, I will lift my cuppa in a toast to you, the amazing women and men who adore the amazing women in your lives. I will toast those who have survived the 47^th year, those who are in it, those who are approaching it…..Just hope I can remember what it is I’m doing. Up note is I’m sure I will be chatting with the royal we and one of us will keep me on track.

❤ Leigh
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