Today’s Mom Tears™ are brought to you by “I have Mom Overload” and “Seriously, I am one exhausted girl!”
Here’s the thing I am no spring chicken and in almost desperate need of being exiled to a deserted island or at the very least sent to my room without dinner. Oh, I am very well aware that my life is blessed. My tribe is large and supportive. I am surrounded constantly by amazing people who give me the courage and energy to keep moving. That being said I am also just a girl trying to keep my nose above the murky waters treading as fast as I can (with one arm tied behind my back)
I have tremendous pride in being able to keep everything together, at least until I hop in the shower where I feel safe enough to cry without onlookers. Most of what makes me ugly face cry is my ability to over think and worry about any and every situation. I can literally go from a calm state of mind to complete panic mode in less than a Nano second. Don’t be envious it has taken years to perfect this talent!
Here we are the first day of school behind us. The kiddos are all happy with their teachers, dinner is cooking away nicely while filling the house with mouth watering aromas. I am currently slouched in a chair with a new symptom to accompany my overthinking. I shall name this Mom Overload. Perhaps you or someone you know is suffering from it this very moment?!?! I will dig deep to describe its symptoms….
– The most common being trying to please every one all the time while driving yourself deeper into emotional and physical exhaustion aka putting others before yourself and as my father likes to say “Thinking beyond the end of your nose” Though this personality trait can be beautiful to witness it is dog gone tiresome!
– Next up is the fine art of balancing an over flowing plate on a tray covered in cooking oil while wearing roller-skates. Oh, it is possible but the eventual out come is well; to say the least a little messy.
– A never-ending to-do list and children’s extra curricular activities seem to be yet another marker in Mom Overload. Children I have learned can be quite self-absorbed little creatures focusing only on where they need to be instead of all it has taken to be able to make sure they get there. Lunches made, laundry done, dinner served, and cleaned up all to the lovely chorus of “I’m starving” followed closely by “I don’t like that” and my personal favourite “Can I have a snack?” only to be sung as I wipe the last bit of sweat from my brow cleaning up aforementioned meal, not to be out done by solo singers chiming in their current state of boredom.
– Lastly one that is a bit of a snake in the grass. It starts off slowly from a place of love and before too long if one is not careful it can and, has swallowed moms entirely (insert sounds of shock and horror with a few ooohs and ahhhs) Truly it is the scariest of Mom Overload symptoms! Again, you may know someone or are beginning to realize you suffer from this (deep breaths, we can get through it together)
The mom who has forgotten her name (GASP) She is so entwined in her children’s well being that if you looked her in the eye and asked what her passion was; silence would ensue. Perhaps a few sputtering coughs nothing in the way of a sentence ☹ I was once her and truth be told some of my crew are quite quick to point out every flaw I made while I was trying to be everything…..Realizing I was not enough…. That is a horrible feeling.
School has started and with it comes structure. Structure is good. Structure unfortunately puts more on to us moms. (Yes, I have heard that fathers pitch in too ….. ) Today, right now, this minute I honestly don’t know how I will make it all work. Somehow I know I will be able to get it all done. Perhaps I should spend the wee hours of the morning playing out every possible scenario.